I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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