I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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