I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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