Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Randomize
