There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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