You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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