K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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