a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
