what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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