physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
