i just had sex bonerless
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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