drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize