Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
