Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Randomize
