did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
