I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize