I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
it's great music for shaving your balls
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
