no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
