No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
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