he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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