Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
