I showed him my bush... on skype.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize
