dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
where does the pee come out of this thing
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
