Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize