she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
She announced her abortion via fbk
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize
