I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
