Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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