Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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