i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
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