there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
