And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
