I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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