Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
