He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
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