I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
