therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Send help, water and tortillas.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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