I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
