It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize