Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
