i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
