are you still at the devil's house?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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