This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize