he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
