WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
