i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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