what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
