i think my tv is drunk
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
