No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Randomize
