Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
