I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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